Everything in Moderation?

This is something we in the weight loss community hear very often, you can have everything you want but in moderation. I think I’m one of those special people who can’t do that. 

It took me a little bit of time to really see results from WW and I started getting discouraged. So instead of eating my feelings, I put that frustration into waking 3+ miles at least 3x a week. To keep myself accountable, I walk with my neighbor and best friend Mary who has the same goal of health as I do. 

So finally after 2 weeks, I saw results. When I lost my first 7lbs I was ecstatic; but I let myself have a bit too much freedom. I was under the impression that I could eat a few cookies here and there, and if I’m being honest more than that. I got lost in the moderation of it all. I was using up my daily smart points and dipping into my weeklies because I thought it was ok. 

Boy was I wrong. Don’t get me wrong, it felt great to eat what I wanted “in moderation” but the scale made me feel otherwise. Since that first loss, I have only lost an additional 3lbs bringing the grand total for one month to 10lbs. 

For someone who has as much as I do, more than 100lbs to lose, the weight should be melting off. 

So I reassessed what I had been eating and discovered that, even in moderation, my body can’t have cookies every day. Now as a treat maybe once a month, yes I will be more than happy to allow myself a few cookies. And I will savor them. I will enjoy them because I don’t eat them all the time. 

Moderation may work for some people, but it sure as shit won’t work for me. 



via Daily Prompt: Cusp

I have been working at my job for about 9 months and I really like it, but it wasn’t what I want to do with my life. So I thought to myself, why waste my time at a job that isn’t getting me experience with what I want to do?

So I found another job. The ice rink that Matt works at (and I score keep at) was hiring for a front desk person so I pounced on it. Within a few days I had the job and a few days later I was starting my training.

Basically what I do is make sure that everything is running smoothly at the rink and check people in and rent skates out. Its an easy job, much like Dotty’s, but requires a bit more brain power. I hadn’t had to think about anything for my job at Dotty’s because everything was so routine; I had my regulars and all I do is get them drinks or cash in free slot play. But with the Fox Valley [Ice Arena] job, I have to think. It’s such a refreshing place to be. I absolutely adore it. I get to interact with people during the day, which I love, and I get to spend my days in an ice rink!

I feel like I’m on the edge of something here, the cusp if you will. I feel excited to go to work, rather than dreading it. I think I finally understand what it’s like to love your job. I mean, that’s not to say that I didn’t love jobs before – because I did. When I worked at Old Navy, I loved my job. I may have had days that I hated everything and everyone, but that job was amazing. I made life-long friends and learned how to use a steamer and keep my balance walking up ladders.

I never really watched hockey growing up. It was a strictly baseball and football house for us, until MLS came around which I avoided like the plague. But the playoffs the year before I met Matt was when I discovered my love for the sport, or at least my interest. My dad is all about the Bay Area sports teams, so my first taste of hockey was the San Jose Sharks (blah). I was hooked from my first game. Then I started going to the college hockey games with Kita and then met Matt. When we first started dating, I had decided I was an Oilers fan, because I liked watching the show “Oil Change” on NHL Network. But Matt is a huge (HUGE) LA Kings fan so I started watching those games with him.

I now call myself a Kings fan, much to my father and best friends’ dismay. But I’m an avid watcher of the sport, and I honestly could care less about what team is playing. So working at a rink makes sense to me. I get to be around the people who love ice sports as much as me, because I also love figure skating. I really like curling too, but we don’t have that at the rink.

Basically, I feel like I’m on the edge of something really exciting and I can’t wait to see what happens. So for now, I’m so happy. I have nothing in collections, payment arrangements set up for all my bills not in collections, I’m not living paycheck to paycheck anymore. 2017 is my year, and I can’t wait to dive in.



Little things that make me happy

Today I want to tell you about a few things that make me happy. Sometimes in life you need a reminder of the small things in life that give you enjoyment. 

These are little things, things that aren’t obvious. These are the things that make me happy! 
– The smell of coffee in the morning 

– How comfy my bed is

– When a dog really loves you

– When M dances

– Hugs and kisses from my Pumpkin

– Surprises

– The first rain

– New books

– Hearing that one song you need to hear

– A cool breeze on a warm day

– Kitty cuddles

– Sunflowers

– Naps

What makes you happy? Let me know in the comments or on Twitter or Instagram @iblog1988


Stick to Your Guns. 

(No, not the band.) 

It’s something that I’ve always been afraid of, losing my authenticity. Although to be honest I’m not too unique, but who really is? I was reading in a book recently, Furiously Happy I believe, and she said (I’m just going to directly quote the book because this passage is too good)“I don’t understand why people keep pushing that ‘Don’t be some random person. BE UNIQUE’ message. You’re already incredibly unique. Everyone is incredibly unique. That’s why the police use fingerprints to identify people. So you’re incredibly unique … but in the exact way that everyone else is. (Which, admittedly, doesn’t really sing and is never going to make it on a motivational T-shirt.) So none of us are unique in being unique because being unique is pretty much the least unique thing you can be, because it comes naturally to everyone. So perhaps instead of “BE UNIQUE” we should be saying, “Be as visibly fucked up as you want to be because being unique is already taken.” By everyone, ironically enough.

Or maybe we should change the message to ‘Don’t just be some random person. Be the MOST random person.’”

And Jenny is right, everyone is so worried about being unique that they end up being just like everyone else. It can be frustrating to try and be your own person, because even though they say “be yourself, everyone else is already taken” it’s kind of bullshit.

That’s why I’m more worried about being authentic than being unique. Although I’m sure they’re like the same thing but the wording sounds better lol. Oh god, did I really just use “lol”? Authenticity, to me, means sticking to your guns and not wavering in your morals and values. I think this is something very special because not everyone is like that.

I’m not one of those kids that was straight-edge or said I was going to keep me virginity till marriage but I always admired the people who did because, if they stuck with it, I thought that was very cool of them; they set their minds to something and saw it through. Not everyone is like that though. I’ve been one of those people before, someone who didn’t see something through. I fact, I have a half-finished blanket that I started knitting about 3 years ago and I still haven’t finished.

But I find my authenticity in how I present myself everyday. I haven’t always been authentic to myself, but in the last ten years I think I’ve finally figured it out. Or at least most of it. I don’t follow trends often, but those that I do I make sure they’re ones I like because I like them not because my favorite celebrity does.

I think everyone at a certain point gets to this state of mind; Where they just don’t feel the need to follow the ridiculous trends. Like, ok I get it, the 90’s were funky and cool but we left that shit behind. Some of it I like but it’s stuff that I never really let go of in the first place.

But if you feel truly deep in your soul that following trends is what makes you feel alive, then that’s you feeling authentic. If you feel deep in your core that wearing a tail and ears is your bliss, then that’s you being authentic. I’m not here to tell you how to live your life, I just want to share with you how I live my life. I live my life authentic. I do not waiver. I know what I like and I’m not ashamed.

I like stuffed animals. I like wearing my hair half up in a man-bun style. I wear short shorts in the summer even though I’m hefty. I call myself hefty instead of fat. I love to fish. I love hockey. I love my boyfriend. I love living in a travel trailer. I have an anxiety disorder that I treat with medication. I am not ashamed of who I am. And you shouldn’t be either.

(Edit: I’m sorry if the photo looks weird, I’m posting from my phone)


What makes you feel authentic? Let me know in the comments or on Twitter or Instagram @iblog1988

Growing up won’t bring us down

Growing up means a lot of different things to a lot of different people.

For me it means having my own space and doing my own thing, not having to rely on anyone to help me. Independence.

I’ve been working at dead-end jobs for the last 10 years and I have no been happy, truly happy, at any of them. The company that I’m currently employed by was just bought out by another company and that has opened the door for so many more possibilities for me.

I’ve always had a knack for operations and keeping a store a float. I’m a people pleaser and an overachiever to a fault.

When the new company sent us all to training, I took to heart the fact that they enjoy hiring from within. I immediately, I’m not kidding I was in the meeting doing this, got on their website to look for openings in positions that would get me away from sales.

Their corporate office is in a different state, but I applied anyways. M and I moved out here 3 years ago for him to go to school. He got to choose where we went last time. So now it’s my turn.

originally I was going to go over how I fixed my resume before applying, but I basically just went on trust old Pinterest and searched “resume” and followed the directions.

So instead I just wanted to share the good news with someone who I’m finally taking my life into my own hands and doing what I want to do. I know it’s a shot in the dark for me to get this position, but you never know until you try!!